𝒶

image

❛  I’ve  officially  given  up.  I’m  dropping  out  and  sleeping  the  rest  of  my  life.  ❜  He  dramatically  sighed,  collapsing  back  in  his  seat  as  he  slaps  the  book  closed  with  a  dramatic  gaze  off  to  his  side.  ❛  I’d get an A in napping.  ❜ / @smrtst

smrtst‌:

gwen  observed  him  quietly.  he’s  jittery  —-  well  ,  moreso  than  usual&  if  gwen  didn’t  know  him  well  ,  she  probably  would’ve  passed  it  off  as  normal  behavior.  she  doesn’t  comment  on  it  ,  just  letting  him  doing  his  thing.  she  lets  herself  get  lost  in  her  thoughts  ,  until  he  starts  stammering  &  her  attention  is  back  on  him.

image

her  eyes  widen  ,  but  she  lets  a  broad  smile  take  over  her  features.  ❛  —-  yeah  ,  yeah.  ❜  play  it  casual  ,  stacy.  even  if  you  are  exploding  on  the  inside.  (  her  smile  is  probably  betraying  her  right  now  —-  gwen  can’t  help  it  ,  she’s  ecstatic.  )  ❛  when  &  where   ❜

❛  that worked ?  ❜  the words flowed right out before he could stop them.  not that he was complaining that she said yes. his heart was  P O U N D I N G  in his chest with anticipation. a laugh followed, though huffed in relief. ❛  i uh —— i didn’t mean it like a bad thing.  ❜  his clearance was still followed by a grin.

image

when ? that was a good question.  ❛  are you … are you busy tonight ? i don’t have the internship or anything. i still have physics homework to do but … that shouldn’t really take long if um … you want to go out tonight.  ❜  he didn’t want to pressure her on it with his own excitement, yet he still couldn’t find it in himself not to stammer.

smrtst‌:

image

❛  web  -  head  ?  nah.  not  personal  enough.  ❜  gwen’s  laughter  sparkles.  ❛  i  gotta  have  my  own  nickname  for  you.  ❜  her  forehead  creases   in  worry  ,  but  she  keeps  a  light  smile  on  her  face.  ❛  you  are  good.  trust  me.  is  there  anything  i  can  do  ?  &  don’t  say  ,  ‘  gwen  ,  you  don’t  have  to  do  anything  ‘.  because  i’m  going  to  do  things  for  you  no  matter  what  you  say.  ❜

image

peter  held  back  a  laugh.  of  course,  she  took  the  words  right  out  of  his  mouth.  ❛  you really  uh  …  gotta  stop  doing  that.  ❜  he  laughed  lightly,  it  was  endearing.  a  suppressed  smile  followed  his  expression  before  he  continued.  ❛  i  uh  i  don’t  know,  honestly.  i’m  bad  at  the  whole  knowing  what  i  need  thing.  i  mean  you  know  how  screwed  up  my  sleep  schedule  is,  gwen.  ❜  peter  inquired,  ❛  you  can  call  me  whatever  you want.  except  pedro,  or  web - head  because  that  gets  really  annoying,  especially  when  they  ask  me  to do  the  hand  thing.  ❜

falls asleep with her head on his lap !
image

he’d almost fallen asleep himself, though he’d jolted awake at the end credits of the movie from the familiar star wars tune. it was almost 2 in the morning and he hadn’t even realized the study session had turned into more of a movie night. as peter nearly decided to raise himself from the floor, he felt a weight on his legs that nearly frightened him till he saw gwen, fast asleep. 

gently, he relaxed himself back trying to be as slow and quiet as possible. should he have woken her up ? probably. instead, he turned off the television and tugged a blanket down from behind him to cover her. using the same blanket to cover himself, he relaxed back and found himself drifting off just as quickly but peacefully.

16. What inspired you to start writing?
image

personally, i loved the idea of creating and bringing things from my imagination to life. writing felt like the gate to doing that. i’d always been a story teller ( including a dramatic ones ) when i was really little. i also adored reading different books and i hoped and dreamed i could do the same thing that those authors did one day.

and while i do write personal novels and things off tumblr, i honestly have to say my main source of inspiration that came from writing was rick riordan. it sounds silly, but when i was in sixth grade i read the first percy jackson book series and it kick started me into creating ocs, make little stories for them, and the likes. not even a few months after i finished the series i sat down and started working on my own idea, which is actually still in the works today ! 

@smrtst

status : no longer accepting

peter hesitated, falling back on his feet as he rocked back and forth. his heart pounded within his chest, which carried the sound straight to his eardrums. ( you can do this, pete, just ask ! ) yet it seemed to be much harder than he thought.

image

❛ i um … i was uh … ❜ he stammered, voice trailing off in a quiet ring of stutters before he let out a shaky sigh. ❛ gwen do you uh … maybe want to um … go on a um … date ? with me ?

@smrtst // starter call

smrtst‌:

image

❛  hey  ,  bug  boy  ,  ❜  gwen  says  ,  a  smile  creeping  on  her  face  as  she  says  it.  she  reaches  over  and  gently  grabs  his  hands  ,  ❛  you  look  nervous.  ❜  which  ,  in  reality  ,  is  probably  not  saying  much  when  it  comes  to  peter  parker.  for  once  ,  however  ,  she’s  genuinely  concerned.  ❛  what’s  got  you  so  worked  up  ?  ❜

@spldertm  gets  some  softness

image

peter  laughs  quietly  at  the  nickname.  that  was  a  first.  ❛   i  think  the  correct  term  is  web -  head.   ❜  the  joke  is  light  soft  as  just  as  the  grin  that  followed.  ❛   nothing,  just  uh  you know  .  .  .  spidey  stuff.  internship.  an  accumulation  of  life.   ❜   his  hands  gently  squeezed  hers  in  response.  ❛   but  it’s  cool.  i’m  good.   ❜

smrtst‌:

truthfully  ,  gwen  is  rather  thankful  that  peter  has  low  expectations  from  her.  it  is  probably  going  to  take  quite  a  bit  of  time  to  truly  process  this  entire  situation.  but  the  part  that’s  telling  her  that  he’s  being  honest  keeps  nagging  at  her.  &  it’s  overpowering  most  of  her  thoughts.  to  her  ,  this  is  a  sign.  she  just  has  to  take  the  chance  &  trust  him.

his  ramblings  do  nothing  to  ease  her  mind  or  worries.  in  fact  ,  all  they  do  is  raise  her  blood  pressure.  how  does  he  say  this  so  casually  ?  how  is  he  not  …  nope.  nope  ,  she’s  not  going  to  entertain  that  idea.  that’s  just  going  to  make  her  anxiety  worse.  while  she  has  to  admit  ,  some  of  his  jokes  are  inappropriate  ,  she  does  find  some  humour  in  fighting  a  guy  who  was  dressed  as  a  rhino.  (  it  still  freaks  her  out  ,  but  anything  will  help  ease  this  situation.  )

image

❛  you  —-  okay.  that’s  …  that’s  um  ,  a  lot.  ❜  gwen  purses  her  lips  &  begins  to  fidget  ,  playing  with  her  hands  &  avoiding  his  gaze.  ❛  just  because  you  can  heal  super  quickly  doesn’t  mean  you  should  exert  your  body  too  much.  ❜  she  sighs.  ❛  it’s  no  good  to  develop  habits  like  that.  you  don’t  want  to  crash  one  day  because  you’re  physically  &  mentally  exhausted.  this  …  this  is  a  big  responsibility  you’ve  given  yourself  ,  peter.  the  least  you  could  do  is  try  take  care  of  yourself.  especially  if  mrs.  parker  knows  you’re  out  there  fighting  bad  guys.  ❜

❛  gwen, i’m really sorry.  ❜  peter  remarked  quietly,  and  yet  he  still  felt  guilty  for  her  finding  out  in  that  way.  he  could  plead  his  case  as  much  as  he  wanted.  anything  he  would  say  would  possibly  only  make  matters  worse.  ❛  aunt  may  knows.  ❜  a  reality  he  didn’t  care  for  but  he  confirmed  the  statement.  ❛   the  thing  is  .  .  .  if  i  don’t  do  this  nobody  will.  i  know  we  have  cops  and  law  enforcers  but  .  .  .  you  know  that  there’s  even  things  they  can’t  control.   ❜   

image

❛  i  owe  that  much  uncle  ben.  ❜  he  whispered,  it  almost  was  inaudible.  he  pushed  it  off,  making  it  disappear just that much quicker.  it  was  a  deeper  meaning,  but  he’d  keep  that  under  wraps.  ❛  there’s  just  too  much  that  comes  with  these  .  .  .  powers.  i  try  to  be  as  safe  as  possible  but  there’s  too  much  for  someone  else  who’s  life  might  be  in  danger.  i  can’t  risk  that.  ❜

smrtst‌:

gwen  shifts  uncomfortably  on  her  bed  ,  taking  in  his  story  &  trying  to  make  some  sense  of  it.  she  remembers  the  incident  at  oscorp  —-  someone  infiltrated  an  off  -  limits  room  &  they  never  found  the  culprit.  oscorp  quietly  swept  it  under  the  rug.  it  was  never  to  be  talked  about  ,  &  truly  ,  gwen  paid  very  little  attention  to  it.  part  of  her  is  shocked  that  peter  was  the  one  who  got  in  there.  but  as  she  continues  to  listen  to  the  story  ,  that’s  probably  the  most  normal  detail  that  comes  from  it.

her  mouth  opens  closes  ,  finding  difficulty  to  really  form  words.  this  story  is  insane  ,  one  she  shouldn’t  be  believing.  fighting  captain  america  ?  stopping  some  supervillain  ?  the  details  are  too  crazy.  the  only  thing  that  really  has  her  doubting  herself  is  his  expression the  way  he  held  himself.  his  voice.  it  was  all  sincere  genuine.  if  she  is  also  going  to  be  honest  with  herself  ,  she  can’t  be  mad.  there’s  no  reason  to  be.  she’s  a  bit  disappointed  that  if  this  is  true  ,  he  puts  himself  in  danger.  the  idea  of  him  being  in  danger  already  worries  her  ,  similar  to  the  way  she  worries  about  her  dad  when  he’s  on  duty.

image

❛  you  have  to  calm  down  ,  ❜  is  the  first  statement  that  escapes  her  lips.  she’s  telling  that  to  him  ,  but  she’s  also  telling  herself  that.  ❛  your  blood  pressure  is  probably  super  high.  &  um  …  i.  i  don’t  know  what  to  say.  because  strange  things  totally  happen  —-  do  you  remember  when  new  york  was  invaded  by  aliens  ?  that  was  wild.  ❜  a  laugh  manages  to  escape  her  lips  ,  a  feeble  attempt  at  easing  any  tension  in  the  room.  ❛  truthfully  ,  your  story  is  probably  …  only  slightly  less  wild.  slightly.  ❜  she  bites  down  on  her  lip  ,  almost  hard  enough  to  draw  blood.  ❛  i  …  i  do  believe  you.  mostly  because  you  almost  fell  off  my  window  ledge  &  was  able  to  catch  yourself  with  your  uh  ,  webshootersalso  ,  if  you  were  lying  to  me  ,  i  don’t  think  ‘  i  am  spider  -  man  ‘  would  genuinely  be  your  story.  ❜  she’s  still  having  difficulty  believing  him  ,  but  she  can  tell  he’s  telling  the  truth.  even  if  the  truth  is  crazy.  ❛  …  do  you  need  more  water  ?  ❜

❛ i don’t expect you to understand. ❜ peter’s voice remarked in the slight silence. it must’ve been a LOT to take in. especially with the way events unfolded. it wasn’t fair to her how she found out let alone how he went about telling her everything all at once. his head remained low, mainly from a mild concussion he’d gotten after flying into the building in his escape route from the cops. ( that is definitely something he should refrain from mentioning )

peter did his best to keep his attention focused instead of on the ache that jittered over his body. he’d be fine, he always was. ❛ gwen, really, i’m fine. i sort of heal … i guess faster than most. it’s definitely a perk. ❜ a light hearted comment for such a hard topic. ❛ i mean … i’m not jesus, but i guess i’m a step closer, right ? ❜ the quip was ill-timed, he knew that and instantly sighed heavily in regret. ❛ sorry … i uh … have a bad habit of making bad jokes in tense situations. ❜

image

even in the current situation she found it in herself to actually try and help him, and peter was eternally grateful for it. he truly was. ❛ i’m good, but thanks. ❜ the boy had to force a smile, cringing internally as he slowly sat back in the chair, letting out a deep exhale. ❛ i also fought a guy dressed as a metal rhino on the brooklyn bridge. that was uh … pretty recent. ❜ actually, only an hour prior. ❛ that horn was a killer. who dresses like a rhino ? of all the animals, why not go with a giraffe or something ? ❜ 

his words came out subconsciously, though it was another failed attempt to lighten his own mood. sometimes it worked but not exactly this time in particular. ❛ trust me, worse has happened. like way worse. ❜ which wasn’t a complete lie. ❛ i got stabbed by this guy with a giant scorpion tail too. he was crazy intuitive, but mostly crazy. ❜

smrtst‌:

gwen’s  brows  furrow  at  the  sight  of  peter.  he’s  visibly  exhausted.  at  this  very  moment  ,  as  much  as  she  wants  to  question  him  –  interrogate  him  –  she  opts  to  do  something  else  for  now.  she  can  save  the  heavy  stuff  for  later  on  tonight.  ❛  can  you  give  me  a  minute  ?  ❜  gwen  asks  &  leaves  peter  in  her  room.

image

she  comes  back  quickly  ,  closing  the  door  as  quietly  as  she  can.  she  has  a  glass  of  water  in  her  hand  ,  a  blanket  draped  over  her  arm.  ❛  i  ,  um.  i  brought  these  for  you.  just  …  you  know  ,  don’t  move  much.  stay  there.  don’t  exert  yourself.  ❜  she  lays  the  blanket  on  the  armrest  of  the  chair  &  puts  the  glass  down  on  the  nearest  surface.  afterwards  ,  she  elects  to  go  back  to  her  bed.  instead  of  laying  down  ,  she  sits  with  her  leg  crossed  ,  eyes  still  focused  on  peter.  ❛  you  have  …  you  have  a  lot  of  explaining  to  do.  ❜

he thanks her silently, taking the water gratefully. it didn’t hit him until then how raw his throat felt. yet peter masked it by doing his best not to cringe as the water hits. ( he really needed to get better at not getting beat up ) ❛ seriously, thanks. i really do appreciate this. ❜ his voice remaiend soft, more than certain it wasn’t just the two of them.

image

a heavy sigh followed, showcasing his nervousness though it had since dwindled. ❛ so uh … i guess i can’t leave till i explain myself ? ❜ peter laughed quizzically, though it was more of a forced laugh. ❛ i get it. this is kinda huge. i guess i’ll start from the beginning then. ❜ personally, he’d felt almost relieved it was just gwen and not some stranger. she was someone he felt he could trust at least. ❛ so um … back in our freshman year, i was sorta on a trip with uncle ben to oscorp. and i sort of broke the rules and went into a disclosed location. and got bit by a radioactive spider. ❜ it almost sounded outlandish to him the first time he told someone, which was ned that is.

❛ i literally woke up like this the next day. i could climb walls, my senses were dialed to eleven. it was insane. ❜ he explained, fiddling with the blanket as he spoke and he attempted to keep eye contact, though failed to. ❛ and then … you know what happened to um … ❜ peter’s voice trailed, though he recovered by clearing his throat, ❛ the incident. and i just sort of … didn’t want that to happen to anyone else, you know ? ❜ 

while he tried to condense his words, it only would make it more confusing, finding himself wanting to just disappear into the chair. ( if only his power was invisibility ) ❛ it just started taking off from there. i was stopping buses with my bare hands. swinging around the city. i invented my webshooters, my web fluid. it just felt natural. like i finally had something that i was doing right for once in my life. something that gave me meaning. ❜

❛ then fast forward six months and mr. stark tracked me down and i fought with him against captain america. that was my trip to germany and i’ve just been doing this thing ever since. i stopped the vulture guy, which also happened to be liz’s dad. ❜ he inquired, hoping that it shed light on the incident with him and her at homecoming. ❛ i saved everyone on the decathlon trip too. there’s just … so much that entailed. ❜

peter’s body leaned forward, utmost sincere before he spoke. his expression was almost apologetic. he didn’t want her to find out this way, if at all. it was his fault this happened due to his recklessness. ❛ i’m so sorry i didn’t tell you, gwen. but it’s … it’s really complicated. only mr. stark, ned, aunt may and now you know. i’m just trying to do the best i can. this —— the suit, the alter ego —— i am nothing without it. please just … don’t tell anyone. ❜